The F12 key has existed for a long time—as far back as 1965, if Wikipedia is to be believed. Since then, it has had many uses. On Mac computers, the F12 key is used as the "volume up" key. On my Windows machine at work, the provided Dell keyboard's F12 key can be used to skip forward a track, but only if you hold down Fn first. Regardless of its purpose, billions of keyboards around the globe have an F12 key.
...except for this one.
Well clearly it had an F12 key at some point, but not anymore. The keyboard, though, looks grimy and old. The reason for that, is because it is grimy and old. I found it in the basement of my collage as I was searching for old electronics. I guess I succeeded.
Anyway... cleaning montage:
Much better. Now you may be wondering why I went through all that effort to clean some ancient and grimy old keyboard. That's because it's not just any old keyboard—it's the best keyboard ever made. Looking at the images, we can see that each key has a spring. Those springs buckle when the key is depressed, creating an incredible feeling that keyboard today only attempt to match.
This keyboard is called the IBM Model M. You know a keyboard must be good when it has a Wikipedia page.
This one was made January 28th, 1994, manufactured by Lexmark. It is the best keyboard I have ever used. It took zero time for me to acclimate into the new keyboard, and the feeling is incredible. Unfortunately, it has no Windows/Command/Mod/Super keys, and only 2-key rollover, making it unsuitable for video games. But for typing... there's nothing better.
Alongside the Model M, I found the matching IBM mouse, which is a piece of shit that nobody likes. It has a ball and no scroll wheel. Literally unusable.
In lighter news, I found something else.
This keyboard is the IBM Model F. Again, all good keyboard have a Wikipedia article. It is fucking filthy.
Just look at those disgusting keys!
My manager wanted dibs on one of the keyboards, and I was happy to give him one, since he's great.
He also cleaned his up, and it looks even better than mine!
Now that we can properly see this thing, what in the hell?
Let's play a game called "what in the world is wrong with this keyboard?"
Of course, I saved the best for last:
Why not use that extra space for "*" and "/"? Who knows? This keyboard was made before keyboard layouts were standardized, so IBM just threw everything at the wall and see what stuck.
The keyboard, though, is made of METAL and weighs MORE THAN A BRICK. If you hit someone with this keyboard, it is assault with a deadly weapon. I could legitimately kill someone with this thing. It's glorious, and my manager loves it. He's set it up at his desk at home.
You can probably guess what I wrote this blog post with.
The Model M is so nice.
Anyway, I ordered a replacement F12 key, and it should arrive in a couple days.